How to Create a Life You WANT to Live In

In a session with my therapist last year, she said something to me that was super simple but changed my perspective: 

When she said that, a lightbulb went off in my head. 

I was creating a life for myself, but it wasn’t the one I truly wanted. 

It was probably a B-  life. I had a stable job with a good paycheck, a solid community of friends, lots of hobbies, and traveled multiple times per year. 

From the outside, it probably looked like an A+ life, but no one could tell that I was pretty unhappy. 

It even got to the point where I would have weekly breakdowns because I felt stuck. (Although, I partially blame seasonal depression for that—thanks, NYC winter.)

Rather than accepting this life for myself, I knew I had to make a change.

Here are a few tips to create a life you WANT to live in 👇

1. Assess where you are right now

When you think about the following categories, how would you rate them out of 10 at this very moment? What are the top 2 most important categories for you right now?

• Career

• Romantic Relationships

• Family & Friendships

• Money

• Health (Physical & Emotional)

• Social & Fun

Now that you have this assessment, how do you feel about where you are? 

2. Decide if you want to make a change

The next step is to decide if you want to make a change.  

A lot of people are okay with a B- life (no judgement if that's you). It can be comfortable and easy to follow the safe path! 

However, what's meant for you might feel scary, and you never know if you don't take a risk and try. 

3. Think about the people whose lives you admire

Maybe it’s a colleague at work or someone you follow on social media. What about their lifestyle do you like?  

For me, I admired people who built their own businesses and were able to create flexibility and freedom with their life, while still prioritizing friends and family.  

4. Reframe your thoughts

This is easier said than done as we often are guided by fear and self-doubt. We tell ourselves things like: 
“It's too late to switch into a new career." 

“I have no idea what I would want to do instead.” 

“I can't do something I love and make a living.”  

I truly believe that the reason successful people are successful is because of their mindset. 

They challenge their limiting beliefs and instead of simply “thinking positive”, they turn them into statements they actually believe. For example… 

• Original thought: “It's too late to switch into a new career." 

• New, less believable thought: “It's never too late to switch into a new career." ← This might be hard for you to believe if your original thought was that it's too late. 

• New, more believable thought: “Many people switch careers in their [30s, 40s, 50s]. It's not impossible to make a switch." ← Based on facts!

 5. Start taking action (Big or small!) 

In order to create the life you WANT to live in, you have to start now. 

What's one action (big or small) that you can take to get a little bit closer to your A+ life?